The Oscars we didn’t see
: Chris Rock acted like he was visiting his grandmother. He couldn’t be him. He had to worry about obnoxious prigs like Sean Penn giving him crap for a Jude Law joke. Jeesh.
: On Howard this morning, Artie Lang said a pal of his wrote a joke for Rock that Rock was too nervous to use. The introduction of Halle Berry he should have made: “Our next presenter has lost more men than the Iraqi army.”
Overnight, Mr. Shaiman and his partner, Scott Wittman, dashed off a mock expos