Rules of news

Rules of news
: Lost Remote’s Steve Safran gives us laws, theories, axioms, and paraodes of news. Selections:

: THE LAW OF BREAKING NEWS

“Breaking news” is usually neither.

: RESTATEMENT OF THE LAW OF BREAKING NEWS, with respect to MURPHY

When there actually is breaking news, it will happen when you are on skeleton staff.

: THE LAW OF NEWS CONSPIRACIES

Those who believe there is a “giant media conspiracy” have never seen three producers try to agree what to get on a pizza.

: COROLLARY TO THE LAW OF NEWS CONSPIRACIES

The media are not right-wing, left-wing, pro-choice, pro-abortion, pro-gun, anti-war or any other such nonsense. We are pro-leaving-work-on-time and very pro-heading-to-the-bar.

THE “BALANCED NEWS” PARADOX

Equally distributed quotes from both sides do not a balanced report make.

[Sorry. Forget the link before. It’s here now.]