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Paris Hilton, rated

21 comments on Paris Hilton, rated

Paris Hilton, rated
: My Howard Stern report for the day: He has seen the Paris Hilton sex tape and rates it a mere 4 out of 10. He says it didn’t turn him on. And she has a “flat ass.” Comparing and contrasting with the Pam Anderson/Tommy Lee tape, he says that was a “love tape” — they were doing what they were doing and happened to tape it. The Paris tape is a tape for the tape’s sake; she practically throws the stud off the bed to get more camera time for herself. Howard says she’s one disturbed girl who needs a serious talking-to from her parents.

: Reminder: Careful on the language on the comments, dear readers. (signed) Family man.

21 responses to “Paris Hilton, rated”

  1. michele Avatar
    michele

    For all your Paris needs, try wizbangblog.com – he has a review of the tape also.

  2. Chuck Avatar
    Chuck

    My take here.
    You know the old saying “There’s no such thing as a bad blow job.”? Well, there is, and it’s on this video. Paris, honey, if this is really you, get yourself a gay male friend and LEARN HOW TO DO IT RIGHT! M’kay?

  3. Richard Cook Avatar
    Richard Cook

    And if there are folks out there that have “Paris Needs” we want to stay away from them. Far away.

  4. Steve Hall Avatar
    Steve Hall

    She’s just not that hot. Really a let down.

  5. Kevin Avatar
    Kevin

    Here’s the link Michele mentioned.

  6. Mike Avatar
    Mike

    she’s a fing kid and you guys are concerned she doesn’t give good head. LOL! Pretty pathetic.
    By the way she’s disturbed Stern says, dam, and I just saw the program on rich kids which showed how normal they are, they even do their own laundry…….. or try to….. LOL!!
    Or were they on Oprah too? I forget.

  7. Mike Avatar
    Mike

    OK, its not a Pam Anderson video, but still……….

  8. Big Daddy T Avatar
    Big Daddy T

    I saw the tape. You guys are nuts. She’s gorgeous. A little lame in the sack but, she’s just a kid. She’ll LEARN.

  9. Mike Avatar
    Mike

    she’s gorgeous? the video sucks so her eyes look like vampire’s? she is hot, but on the video you sure couldn’t tell. She’s a ho that love …. and that’s a beautiful thing regardless.

  10. g wiz Avatar
    g wiz

    Chuck,
    Unless you’ve seen more than the highly edited 3 minute clip that is available on the net, I don’t see how you can conclude that she doesn’t give good hummers. She’s only seen doing it for about 5 seconds max, and it’s impossible to say she’s doing it badly even in that short clip.
    Sorry if I’m taking this too personally but Ive been on the recieving end of plenty of bad hummers, and it is a very serious issue which affects millions of men, so I wouldn’t be throwing around that kind of critcism lightly.

  11. Big Daddy T Avatar
    Big Daddy T

    Mike,
    It’s a HOME VIDEO dude. Not many people invite a lighting technician into their bedroom. I’ll bet you also take issue with the editing and music selection. Who the fuck are you…Roger Ebert? You’re missing the point of why, how and when these videos are made.
    As to the comments made by G Wiz. Amen, brother. Amen.
    She’s hot, man.
    Big Daddy T

  12. tz Avatar
    tz

    why if this is a family man’s blog are you blogging about the Paris Hilton sex tape? isn’t that sort of a contradiction? your post uses “sex”, “ass” and refers to rating her performance screwing. ??? it’s fine, but don’t criticize your commenters for following your lead.

  13. KMK Avatar
    KMK

    Hey now, think she knows what you use to make pickles?
    When you finally get your WI-FI dream will you still listen to Howard on the commute?

  14. Gene Avatar
    Gene

    Jeff, I’m terribly sorry Howard Stern wasn’t turned on by the Paris Hilton sex video, but is this really the kind of stuff you want to blog about?

  15. Jeff Jarvis Avatar
    Jeff Jarvis

    Gene:
    It’s funny. It’s pop culture. It’s media. It’s celebrity. Yes.

  16. Andrea Harris Avatar
    Andrea Harris

    Oh come on, Jeff. You can tell us. You really didn’t want to blog about it, but the voices made you.

  17. hugh macleod Avatar
    hugh macleod

    That poor girl- collecting schadenfreude like Prada handbags.
    Let’s see how well her celeb factor endures once Daddy cuts her off.

  18. Gene Avatar
    Gene

    Gene:
    It’s funny. It’s pop culture. It’s media. It’s celebrity. Yes.
    OK, then how about going beyond the salacious details and putting it into some kind of cultural/historical context– like, for instance, the decline of Western civilization?

  19. Jeff Jarvis Avatar
    Jeff Jarvis

    Gene:
    Because then you’d complain about my devoting more pixels to the topic. And the commentar is obvious. Do we really need another sermon on the price of fame?

  20. paolito Avatar
    paolito

    I believe this tape was shot a few years ago, so she has had some time to “polish up” her techniques. Furthermore, I am interested in how this might actually improve her bad girl image as wel as her career. Britney kisses Madonna, but Paris goes all out…

  21. Marcel Perez Avatar
    Marcel Perez

    How would Howard Stern qualify as a critic at any level about anything?
    His advisory council of experts includes, but is not limited to, such characters as Baa-Baa-Booey, Stuttering John, Elephant Boy, Jackie the Jokeman, High-Pitch Eric, Meethane Man, and the reluctant, but ever-present Robin Quivers.
    Perhaps he polled some of the homeless, alcoholics off the streets after presenting them with a premier showing.