Press the stewardess button once for a Number 1 and twice for a Number 2
: Qantas says under new U.S. rules, passengers may not queue up for the potty on planes and flight attendants have to check the toilets every two hours for suspicious packages.
Now, in fact, we know this is very serious business because one report of why there have been so many security-inspired flight cancellations out of Europe lately is that we got a report that a female terrorist was going to hide explosives inside herself: The Tampbomb.
Long, long ago, I urged that we all fly naked. But hell, even that wouldn’t help with this threat.
This gets scarier every day; how in God’s name do you stop that?
Still on the lighter note, Jill wonders how the heck they’re going to police the potty queue. “I wonder how they’ll organise the toilet needs of passengers. Potties? Draw a number perhaps? Sign up before departure?”
I’m thinking a lottery: Win the Potto Lotto! Or a new revenue stream for airlines that are surely going to lose yet more passengers from these fears: Sell potty passes (and create an open market for them on the plane: I have to go worse than you do, so I’ll buy your pass and give you my bag of pretzels.)
These days, you don’t know whether to laugh or cry or just cower in a corner.