Beam blathers

Beam blathers
: Blog bete noir Alex Beam is asked by Improper Bostonian magazine what he wants for Christmas and reader Dave Ragsdale sends in his answer:

“What I want for Christmas: An Oscar for Billy Bob Thornton’s depiction of Mr. Claus in Bad Santa. A vast upturn in newspaper advertising revenue that would allow all writers with more than 10 days’ experience at the Boston Globe to retire on Cyprus. A Supreme Court ruling freezing the number of U.S. ‘bloggers’ at 150, ranks to be determined by lottery …”

If only we could freeze the number of columnists there.