11thOn Sunday, I said that

On Sunday, I said that I had missed the fact that the day before was the 11th. It was the first 11th I had missed since September. I thought it might be a sign of healing.

I was wrong.

Sunday night, I watched Telling Nicholas on HBO, a documentary about a 7-year-old boy who lost his mother in the World Trade Center attacks and about his family’s struggle to tell him that she was gone. We are brought into his family’s home on Staten Island as they hopelessly hold onto hope, as the wacky sister feuds with her brothers-in-law, as the family gives DNA samples to try to identify their loved one, as the filmmaker befriends the son of a Muslim victim of the attacks, as the grandmother goes into her dead daughter’s apartment for the first time after the attacks and faints.

I couldn’t believe where this was heading; I couldn’t believe what they did:

They recorded the moments when Nicholas’ father told him that his mother was dead. They recorded this dear little boy crying his life out. They recorded him telling his family that “my Mommy is dead.”

I was enraged at the filmmaker and at HBO for this sinful theft of privacy, for this shameful lack of respect, for exploiting this child’s unspeakable pain to make its point.

Point made: The pain is not over. The fear is not over. This crime wounded all of us. It especially wounded the young. It wounded the future. The pain is unspeakable. It could have been any of us. It could have been our children.

They did not need to use this poor little boy to say that.

God, it hurt.

I had not cried once since September 11, not once, no matter what, not from my own memories of surviving the attack, not even from seeing other families devastated, not from the nightmares.

Sunday night, I cried.

A question
: Can any and all of you who know of newspaper people who maintain blogs please send me addresses (email at right)? Thanks much!

Mirror, mirror, on the Web….
: It’s no surprise that the Weblog Foundation idea is No. 2 on blogdex and No. 3 with a bullet on Daypop. Face it: It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy in this self-referential world to write about blogs and then wait for blogs to link to something about blogs. Jane, stop this crazy thing!

: Also predictably — and properly — thoughtful counter thinking and concens are bubbling up.

From Olivier Travers: “I personally don’t see the problem Jeff Jarvis is trying to solve…”

And W6Daily says: “From the Too Much Time On His Hands department: Jeff Jarvis has an idea that he thinks might change everything for weblogs. The Weblog Foundation seems to be an idea balanced on the edge of a knife. It has the potential to be something good, and a perhaps-equal potential to be a self-serving ego trip for the select few bloggers that are able to take advantage of it, the ‘in crowd.’ ”

: If you wonder why I thought a foundation was needed, hear these tin cups rattling.