From the mouths of dogs…

November 1, 2005 by Jeff Jarvis

Triumph the Insult Dog said it on Howard Stern’s show:

Liberatrians are just conservatives who like porn

Suddenly, everything is clear.

  • http://www.dailypundit.com Bill Quick

    Right. And moderates are just morons who can’t make up their minds. See, two can post idiotic, meaningless, blanket insults.

  • http://ruthcalvo ruth

    And here I thought it was that libertarians just weren’t religious. Wow, glad to get that straight.

  • http://www.buzzmachine.com Jeff Jarvis

    So, Bill, he should have said that they’re the ones without a sense of humor?

  • JMD

    I’ve described myself politically as “fairly conservative, but with libertarian leanings.” Lately I’ve become more comfortable with the “Neo-libertarian” label.

    I don’t know how the doctrinaire libertarians feel, but Triumph’s description fits me like a glove. We should put that on posters or something.

  • http://www.dloye.com/myblog/bBlog-0.7.4.tar/blog/ DLoye

    Bumper sticker thinking is good for laughs. It’s much more bumper sticker than thinking.

  • Angelos

    Um, conservatives were the larget consumers of “prostitutional services” during the convention in NYC last year.

    The ones in power are inveterate liars, the ones that vote for them are essentially stupid people, who are easily cowed into voting against their financial self-interest by rich people who talk about God for a couple months before each election.

    Oh, and apparently, they believe cancer possibly followed by death is an appropriate punishment for having sex.

  • http://www.elflife.com/cgi-bin/txt.cgi/ Carson Fire

    Liberatrians [sic] are just conservatives who like porn

    No, no, no. Libertarians are conservatives who like pot.

  • http://www.elflife.com/cgi-bin/txt.cgi/ Carson Fire

    Um, conservatives were the larget consumers of “prostitutional services” during the convention in NYC last year.

    How does somebody come up with stats like that? Did the johns have to sign a book somewhere? Did they have to show their voter registration cards first?

    Or is it, as I suspect, just another mostly made-up smear, just as Democrats are already issuing talking points attacking nominee Alito for ties to the mob.

  • http://unbeknownst.net KirkH

    Libertarians like the freedom to buy porn without a law put in place by politicians trying to appease voters that confuse the bible and the constitution. So the dog is sort of right.

  • http://www.dailypundit.com Bill Quick

    So, Bill, he should have said that they’re the ones without a sense of humor?

    What’s wrong with my sense of humor? Don’t you like my joke about moderates, oh humorless one?

  • http://ruthcalvo ruth

    ‘See, two can post idiotic, meaningless, blanket insults.’
    Humor?

  • John

    Jeez, I hope Libertarians aren’t planning to become the new Canada to Triumph, though it would mean they’d get to have Conan O’Brien come to their house to do a show.

  • Gunther

    “Or is it, as I suspect, just another mostly made-up smear, just as Democrats are already issuing talking points attacking nominee Alito for ties to the mob”

    In the first place, what is a “mostly made up smear”? Does this mean that conservatives weren’t the largest consumers of prostitution during the convention, but that they only placed second?

    As for the point about Alito; way to criticize one set of talking points with one of your own! Only problem is, the talking point you’re criticizing (“Alito has mob ties”) doesn’t exist. Please reproduce the exact document where anyone says that Alito has ties to the mob.

  • http://unbeknownst.net KirkH

    The right wants more control over your life in the form of imposed religion and values. The left want control of your life by raising taxes and taking your money. If you don’t pay taxes you go to jail. If you don’t follow moral laws you pay fines, can’t get married, don’t get benfits, life in jail for pot, etc.

    The left and the right want the same thing, control of your life. Their methods vary but the goals are the same. I wish people would realize that the one dimensional spin engrained by years of Crossfire, Limbaugh and Daily Kos are totally missing the point. They’re all focused on the wrong axis.

    The old libertarians (paleo-libs) were opposed to just about any form of government – which isn’t rational. The new (neo) libertarians just want low taxes and freedom from other people’s subjective moral views. Democrats that think Socialism is just a bad idea and Republicans that don’t think the bible belongs in biology classes might just be unwitting neo-libertarians. Unfortunately we don’t have anyone to vote for becuase we don’t like politicians and to become one would be borderline hypocritical.

  • http://www.elflife.com/cgi-bin/txt.cgi/ Carson Fire

    In the first place, what is a “mostly made up smear”? Does this mean that conservatives weren’t the largest consumers of prostitution during the convention, but that they only placed second?

    Again, did the johns register as Republicans at the prostitute’s rooms? Did the prostitutes in question report this information to the “john political affilation register” at the nearby government office?

    How do you think this “fact” came about? Real statistics, or anecdote? And, if anecdote (most likely), who was providing that anecdote?

    Furthermore, do you not see how you cannot be taken seriously repeating stuff like this?

    As for the Alito innuendo — even Chris Matthews recognized that for what it was (props to him for once). The reason there is such a partisan divide at the moment isn’t because Bush is a far right wing extremist, which is easily proved to the contrary, but that the loud fanatics on the left believe that they and their leaders can Do No Wrong, are Never Wrong, and will retract and disavow No Wrong. Instead of defending the indefensible, and trying to pretend that innuendo isn’t innuendo if it’s not worded just so, Democrats should apologize for this one, or at least disavow the author and his/her motives, and move on to debating Alito’s pros and cons on merits.

    This is a bit off-topic for this post, though. Should I start posting some porn?

  • http://lonewacko.com TLB

    No one who’s even glanced at the Libertarian Purity Test could ever confuse libertarianism with conservatism. And, many Ls are internally inconsistent. Many (like those at Reason) support illegal immigration. Yet, they also profess to support a strong defense and oppose corporate subsidies. Yet, illegal labor is massively subsidized labor, and Mexico is conducting a low-grade invasion of this country.

    The L philosophy is as far removed from the current American system as Communism is. Their ideology is like something from the 12th century or modern-day Somalia. We would be better off if all those who subscribe to Lism left the U.S. to make a new life in that country.

  • http://ruthcalvo ruth

    ‘The reason there is such a partisan divide at the moment isn’t because Bush is a far right wing extremist, which is easily proved to the contrary, but that the loud fanatics on the left believe that they and their leaders can Do No Wrong, are Never Wrong, and will retract and disavow No Wrong.”

    START posting porn?

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  • http://lesterblog.blogspot.com Jon Lester

    The pot correction is indeed closer to the mark.

    As for me, don’t like “porn,” per se. I like glamour photography.

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  • Sherard

    Two things.

    First, how the hell did a tongue in cheek post become a haven for idiotic partison comments ? Get a grip people, seriously.

    Second, Triumph forgot drugs. Libertarians are just conservatives that like porn and drugs. And not necessarily in that order. Heh.

  • JMD

    Well, as an “essentially stupid” person, who is “easily cowed” into voting against my financial self-interest, I thought the dog puppet’s quip was amusing and even a little insightful.

    I’m not sure it’s worth all this heat, though. Yikes.